This weekend was filled with new friends, loud music, patio weather, and little sleep. On Friday I talked to an old friend who I haven’t seen since November and he is one of my few guy friends that is only a friend. Hmmm I never thought that was possible until this past year. I guess it had a lot to do with Jessie and him not being okay with guy friends so it’s a relatively new concept to me. Anyway not to side track my point is after calling him he said he was in Kansas and would be back on Sunday afternoon. I asked if he had a ride from the airport he said no, so I offered. He was really surprised and said what’s up with the generosity and then it hit me. I have been a selfish friend and that really hurts my heart. I hate that I have let myself become so self involved to the point that offering a ride was a huge deal to him. I thought about this a lot yesterday and decided I am going to work much harder at not getting wrapped up in my own little world that I become completely self centered. In efforts to really change I called my old bff A-L and left her a message. I told her I would love to work on our friendship and put more into it. She is a teacher and cheerleading coach so our schedules are very different but we can’t let that be the reason we lose touch. She and I were closer when I lived in Cali and Austin so it would be sad not to be more involved now that we are in the same city. Friday night I went to this great sale at a store called Gender in West Village. I bought some Meltin Pot jeans that were reg. 290 but marked down to 70 okay how much does that rock? Saturday was family day because Tanner was in town from Tech so Tanner, Brit (his gf) myself, mom and dad all headed to Arlington to watch Tyler play baseball. I can tell it’s going to be a long season. I love getting to be a part of his life and all of us spending time together. Saturday night can be summed up with a short story. After club Clear we headed back to my friends where we made frozen pizzas. I was in the middle of cooking one that wasn’t done but it didn’t matter apparently because the next thing I know it was out of the oven and in the stomachs of my drunken guy friends. The girls and I fell over laughing at how dumb they can be.

Last night JC and I had to record a bit and I needed to pick up my new car so to kill 2 birds with one stone I had him drop me off at my grandparent’s house. When we arrived I told him “Please don’t be scared because when we turn the corner Hannah will be at the window.” JC asked “Who’s Hannah?” I said “She is the manikin that stands in the window.” As soon as we turned the corner sure enough he was like “Oh my god!” I know it’s odd but my nin is convinced she helps keep burglars out. I understand the concept of that but none the less it’s a little bit freaky. He met my nin and papaw then we jumped in my car and left. I love to drive fast and my neighborhood has great twists and turns so I thought I would just punch it. I could tell JC was a little scared so I only did it for like 3 min. If it’s just me in the car that is one thing but I would hate to the reason something bad happened to him. We finished recording “Happy Couple” and then I dropped him back off. When I got back to my apt. I decided to attend my first apt. social since it was after all Fat Tuesday. The minute I walked in I started to look for Josh who works with us and also lives in the complex. Before I could find him this guy walked up and the first thing he said was “I’m not a stalker.” WHAT??? Who say’s that other than stalkers. He said he has seen me around the complex and asked if I remembered him. I didn’t but his whole vibe rubbed me the wrong way. Finally Josh walks in and I dart over to the other side of the room with this look on my face like HELP ME PLEASE! I ended up talking with him for a little while and then met 3 new friends so I am super excited about that. The one girl Dora was so sweet I hope I run into her again and who knows maybe even have a new friend out of it. I am definitely looking for a cool chick to hang out with now that my BFF Taylor is busy with her new job and Jason. I’m not saying I won’t see Tay but our time spent hanging out has just become less and less. On a plus side we do have date night coming up and I am really pumped about it.

Last night I realized I desperately needed to go to the grocery store but I absolutely hate going there. I don’t cook and have no real desire to anytime soon so I did the next best thing. I went to the Exxon and bought milk and trail mix you know that healthy all natural kind and its supposed to give you energy. I am a caffeine feign and I feel like I take in way to much on any given day so to find an energy food was great! I have a very close relationship with my grandparents and my parents so when it comes to making big decision in my life I feel like I need to discuss it with both my mom and dad and my nin and papaw. This past month I have had to find a new car because my lease was up and I sold my old one when I was given the FJ Cruiser. I also needed to find an apartment and decide if I wanted and could afford to continue to live alone. I have waited until the last minute in my usual Taylor fashion to set anything in stone and with 9 days left before I was car less and homeless I made my choice. I am going to stay in Canal Side but downgrade to a much cozier and economical apt. that way I can live close and hopefully save on my electric bill. As for a car I knew this would be something I had to go over with my parents and grandparents. I feel like my dad is not feeling as needed lately so I wanted to make sure he and my mom had a big part in this decision. Well yesterday I called him to tell him about a car I looked at over the weekend and then I called my papaw to ask him when I needed to go back up there and talk to the finance guy and that’s when he said “come over here your car is in the driveway.” I was so pumped I was a totally surprised but then quickly felt bad that my dad wasn’t there to see me get it. I have a closeness to all 4 and just don’t want anyone of them to feel like I don’t need them. My dad was still out of town so I drove my new car to my parents to show my mom. I walked in and she was walking out so I tossed her the keys and went to get a drink real quick. When I came back outside to take her for a drive she had already left with my car. I stood there in the driveway just laughing because if you know my mom then you would expect nothing less. She finally pulled back in and said “cute now lets see if you can keep it clean and not keep your closet in it.” I gave her a kiss and jumped in my car to take it back up to my grandparent’s house and as soon as I turned my radio on I saw that my mom changed everything. She changed my stations on both fm’s, she changed my mirrors, my seats, steering wheel, and the color of the lights on my dashboard. I was cracking up. I love my mom very much she makes me laugh and by her doing this it was a feeling that she was okay with the decision I made and not upset she didn’t have a huge part in it.

Last night I was minding my own business when I happen to look up at the TV. There was some pointless basketball game on but I swear just as I looked up one of the players is looking down and we made eye contact. It was so weird I really feel like we were looking at each other. Okay that’s never happened before. Okay I know it’s random but I just thought I would share.

Valentines Day:
I will not recognize this day and by this I mean S.A.D. That’s right singles awareness day and it upsets to have to do this. I have always been the one wearing all red and handing out cute little valentine’s to everyone but not this year! NO! I am not going to acknowledge it because it will only make me sad and I only have room for happy positive energy in my world. I am use to this day sucking with crappy last minute gifts from Jess but at least I had someone there at the end of the day. Well that’s not good enough anymore because dangit I deserve better! This year I will not cry, or gripe over a bad present that was forced because, it’s not like he had 364 days think about it. This year I am going to quietly be happy for those in love but not make a big production about it. To those who are happy in a relationship YAY! YAY for your big neon signs on your desk or in your cubicle in the form of beautiful flowers and chocolates and cards. You know what those signs are saying they are saying HEY TAYLOR YOUR SINGLE AND ALONE!

Walking through the office? Passing all the cubicles SINGLE AND ALONE SINGLE AND ALONE! HEY TAYLOR YOUR SINGLE AND ALONE! SINGLE AND ALONE!

My brother Tyler and I were having a debate and I lost when he said “You don’t live here anymore so why should you get to have a say?” I realized yesterday that he was right and it hit me like a ton of bricks. Let me start from the beginning and how this whole thing got started. Mutley is our outside dog and he is so great and by that I mean loyal and smells bad and sheds terribly. He showed up a few years ago out of nowhere so we took him in and got him healthy. The backyard at my parent’s house is wide open to the street and there is no fence so Tanner installed an electric fence for Mutley. He isn’t a hyper dog but a loving dog he doesn’t leave the yard ever and he helps my mom to feel safer in the house when my dad is out of town which is all the time. The past 3 weeks animal control kept stopping by to take him away because some neighbor complained that because there was no fence they were concerned. I understand if Mutley had a reputation for this kind of behavior but he doesn’t. Saturday my dad went to Louisiana for work and decided Mutley had to go. He said he would be happier there and have more room to run and play with plenty of people to love and care for him. I wasn’t really sad for myself but for Tyler who loves him to no end and for my mom who feels less safe. Last night my dad called and said he was coming home Tuesday night and he would bring Mutley and he could be an inside dog. EWWWWW!!!!!!! No that’s gross! I love him and all but I feel like it would be the equivalent of letting a dirty homeless person roam all over your newly remodeled home. I’m sorry if that seems harsh but its how I feel. I made sure to voice this opinion with Tyler and my mom last night in the kitchen and that’s when Tyler looked over and said that powerful sentence. I was really upset about this because he’s right. I haven’t lived at home for almost 5 years and it just now sunk in. I left the house that night sad to go back to my empty apartment and when I got there I started to wonder why this bothered me. I came up with one explanation which is that I am growing up and now that my mom and I are finally close I don’t have any memories of that relationship when I lived there. Now that I know why Tyler’s words stung I can move past it and feel like I might be on the road to adulthood. I can start to make the memories with my mom when I am there visiting and not worry so much about the ones we missed out on when I lived at home years ago.

This was one of the best weekends in a very long time. My weekend started a little rocky and continued with me feeling sorry for myself because all my friends were coupled up for the weekend. I have said this before but I don’t want a boyfriend right now just someone at times to go out with and have fun with. Friday night I decided to throw on my flip flops and keep it casual. I called Dianthe and Shanon to meet me at Razoo’s where one of my best friends Jennifer works. Shanon brought Shahayla and her friend Keith then there was Dianthe and myself. We had so much fun! That is until this chick at the table over from us started making rude comments about Jennifer calling her a white trash waitress. There was about 12 people sitting at there table who had nose bleeds. GROSS! First off you don’t just get that unless you are a coke using loser! The girl was out of line talking to Jennifer that way so I had to step in and ask her what her problem was. She yelled back then Shahayla stood up and said “EXCUSE ME! B” “DON’T TALK TO HER THAT WAY!” It was great uncalled for drama. I wouldn’t fight and by that I mean I am a bit of a wimp and would definitely lose. None the less it was eventful. Saturday was pretty lazy until my mom called and asked me to go with her to get our nails done. She got a gift certificate for her birthday so we got mani pedi’s. I loved spending time with my mom she is greatness! With my nails looking great I went back home to my apt. and got ready to go out. I had a delicious dinner and then watched a very talented guy play acoustic guitar in this vintage style coffee house. I couldn’t have asked for a better night. I love musicians and not just the hot ones I mean I appreciate there creativity and I respect that so much. He did these Damien Rice types of songs and even a few Damien Rice covers. If you have the chance to see someone local trying to make it playing for free at coffee house then take it! Sunday not as lazy I, was up early and with my brother and mother all day. We took Tyler to buy his girlfriend a Valentines gift and it was so sweet because he was excited to do this for her. We shopped then went to a high calorie lunch. YUM! Mercado Juarez is the best Mexican food in Texas! I went home after this to take a quick nap before I got to go meet and watch………Dave Navarro!!! I love him he is so great and I didn’t realize until last night how good of a guitarist he really was. I had backstage passes so I was face to face with some of the rockers that I have huge crushes on, Tommy Lee and Dave Navarro. We met everyone from Rockstar Supernova and Panic Channel. I was really excited and nervous. I don’t usually get that way but it was DAVE NAVARRO my celeb crush!! I definitely stayed out way to late and now I am trying to make through a long Monday.

I have the world’s rudest neighbor! He moved in to the complex about 10 days ago and since then he has been the world’s most obnoxious neighbor. It started when he parked horizontally across 8 spots (including mine) with his stupid truck and Uhaul attached. I know moving is a pain so that didn’t so much tick me off I just let that one go. The next day same thing but no Uhaul just his ugly truck in my spot and 4 others. He loves to hang elephants late at night. I say elephants because what could possibly be so heavy that requires a million nails. He slams his door constantly and talks no he yells so loud when he is on his phone. I finally got my spot back the spot that I have been parking in for almost 6 months everyday. I am guessing he was not happy about that so he decided to be a jerk and park inches away from my driver side door. These things are all fixable and maybe a misunderstanding on my part, maybe he isn’t rude or so I thought. Yesterday I walked by and said “hey what’s up I live next door so welcome.” OMG! He looked at me shrugged his shoulders and said “huh!” Its official I have worlds rudest neighbor!!!!!

I have the world’s rudest neighbor! He moved in to the complex about 10 days ago and since then he has been the world’s most obnoxious neighbor. It started when he parked horizontally across 8 spots (including mine) with his stupid truck and Uhaul attached. I know moving is a pain so that didn’t so much tick me off I just let that one go. The next day same thing but no Uhaul just his ugly truck in my spot and 4 others. He loves to hang elephants late at night. I say elephants because what could possibly be so heavy that requires a million nails. He slams his door constantly and talks no he yells so loud when he is on his phone. I finally got my spot back the spot that I have been parking in for almost 6 months everyday. I am guessing he was not happy about that so he decided to be a jerk and park inches away from my driver side door. These things are all fixable and maybe a misunderstanding on my part, maybe he isn’t rude or so I thought. Yesterday I walked by and said “hey what’s up I live next door so welcome.” OMG! He looked at me shrugged his shoulders and said “huh!” Its official I have worlds rudest neighbor!!!!!

Last night was my mom’s birthday and I for the first time pulled off a surprise party. I had my aunts and grandparents and great grandmother waiting at the restaurant for her. Tyler’s baseball practice ran late so as usual Taylor fashion we were 2 min. late. I felt but as soon as we go there it was so fun. I really enjoy my family. Don’t get me wrong we have our issues but at this time for that hour we were just hanging out and celebrating with my mom. I went home before we had to leave and my mom was all dressed up just hanging out and waiting for me and as soon as I walked in the house she said she wished she had raised us differently. I wasn’t sure exactly what she meant by that so I said “Are you disappointed or something?” and she said “No. I just wish I wouldn’t have raised yall to be so independent and I wish you would call me for things more.” I know she is lonely sometimes and would like to feel more needed by us. My mom when we were kids would make us call the doctor and look up the number she would have us do little things on our own that way we could learn to be self sufficient. I was like yea I guess your right I mean you don’t even know all my doctors and that made her a little sad. She wants us to call her and need her and she wants us all to move back home. I know sometimes my parents joke around about Tanner and I leaving the house but now she really wants us back home. She pleaded with me to move home and I could come and go as I pleased and they wouldn’t bother me. I finally changed the subject and said omg I really need to do laundry and she quickly chimed in and said “I will do it just bring it over here.” I am getting a little upset writing this because I never realized until recently how nurturing my mom can be. Growing up it was a little more tough love and now I am seeing her soft side. I don’t know what to do about moving back for a month or two. It would be a great way to save money and make her happy but I love living alone.

Tonight I will be at the Irving Art Center judging a talent show that all 3 high schools participate in and I am so excited. There are going to be emo bands, solo singers, dancers, comedians and then a variety which include talents like belly dancing. It starts at 7 and it’s free for everyone. Come check it out these students are very creative and I can’t wait to see there performances. Okay so yesterday I realized I have 27 days to find a new car and an apartment. I am freaking out a little because I am not good at deciding this stuff mainly the car situation. I am going to look this weekend and hope I find a good deal on an Audi TT but I am not sure if that’s what I even want. I put in my 30 days notice at the loft I am in currently so I guess now its official I have to move very soon. I am going to be living alone again and want something safe with good parking and not too expensive. I have no idea where that is exactly but I think I am hoping something will catch my eye this weekend. HELP!!!!!!
I have decided that I am solar powered and by this I mean when it’s sunny and pretty out I get so much done but when it’s rainy and cold all I will accomplish is sleeping. My apartment is messy, my car is messy, and I can’t keep my thoughts straight. It looks like I am going to take this weekend to be responsible and clean, find a place, get a car, and get my mom a birthday present.